She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Randomize
