to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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