My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
