half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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