this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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