I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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