well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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