absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
