Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Swine flu is the new snow day.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
