no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Every concussion has its silver lining
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize