carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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