did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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