found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
