I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Houston, we have a squirter
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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