we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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