Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
