i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
