No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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