And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
