oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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