So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize