Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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