doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
