he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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