I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
