Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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