Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Randomize
