What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize