what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
