GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
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