If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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