I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
