i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize