No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
