looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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