return my video game
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
