garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize