dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Randomize
