careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
