In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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