That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
