....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
