Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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