plz talk dirty to me
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
