so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
