I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
