I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Operation Purity has been aborted
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Randomize
