oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
