when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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