i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
All the doctor said was why
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize